Green depression

I'm all for green living. I recycle everything I can (you can't recycle glass in Hong Kong - go figure), I take public transport as often as possible (although when it's 4am on Sunday morning and I have an early start, I admit I'll take a cab home rather than wait for the night bus), I avoid using carrier bags whenever possible, carrying the cool Twiggy M&S bag my friend brought me back from the UK or an equally durable canvas bag from the local Japanese store Citysuper, I switch off lights, unplug phone/camera/ipod chargers, try to be sparing with water when showering and brushing teeth, try to eat veggie a couple days a week, make my own lunches at least a couple times a week, and when I buy, I rinse and recycle/clean and reuse the tubs.

Reading the statistics on how endangered our planet is should be enough to spur all of us into doing something, no matter how little, to reduce our negative impact on the Earth. Some people are able to take big steps, refitting their homes with solar panels, growing their own vegetables and grain, and selling or swapping any extras, giving up anything that isn't proven to be eco/sustainable/ethical and generally living as paragons of virtue. Some take a slightly less extreme path, such as my good friend Jade who writes the fabulous Jungle Fever blog - she is doing small things in the big city to try to live a greener life and encourage her readers to follow suit. And then there are people like me who do try, blame their surroundings when they don't do more, and then get scared when they read how soon the polar caps might melt.

Two green things depressed me this week. The first was reading last month's Marie Claire. The magazine has recently shifted its focus onto being green and glamorous, featuring designers that use ethical production methods and eco-friendly fabrics, all-natural beauty products, environmentally friendly holiday destinations and celebs who are making a difference to the way they live in order to help the planet. All well and good. In fact, very commendable, given how popular a magazine it is.

But I have several problems. The first being that, as much as I love them, magazines are not very green. They're 200+ pages of glossy former trees. Even if you pass them around to friends then recycle them, and even if they're from sustainable forests or recycled paper, they're STILL paper. And this one comes out every month.

Another issue I had is the price of some of the suggested alternatives for makeup/clothing/holidays-without-travel. I just can't afford to pay or justify paying £50 for face wash. I don't think it's being cheap - I would just rather go and watch the ballet or restock my bookshelves or fill up my freezer (more energy efficient than leaving it empty). And paying several hundred pounds for a pair of jeans, as addicted to them as I am is criminal - I'd much rather give it away. Or, more sensibly, sponsor a child or save an acre of rainforest.

Something else that riled me was the placement of adverts. I understand that a publication like Marie Claire cannot, overnight, change from high-end fashion glossy to hemp-wearing handout. But it seems rather ironic to have a feature on how beautiful "green" clothes brands are (no cardigans or Jesus sandals here), and how we should spend large sums on one quality piece that we're assured was made by real grown-ups, not eight-year-olds, and on the following page to have an advert for an underwear set (bra and pants) from Matalan for only a fiver! Or how about the reams of adverts and mini-articles on taking holidays in Britain, taking the train to get there and either going posh camping or staying in a manor house (including one in my oh-so-boring West Country hometown) or on a farm, and then doing exotic photoshoots for the fashion photo story in Nevis, in the Caribbean. Don't try to tell me that the Caucasian model, the stylists, photographers, wardrobe assistants just "happened" to live there.

It's all very well to encourage people to be greener and make more of an effort. But this issue came across as a rather depressing sermon - it not only highlighted how much trouble the world is in (good), it was very patronising to all of us who can't afford to install our own windmills in the back garden, or who don't have the space to grown oats and beans and barley. Bad show, Marie Claire. Find a balance.

The second depressing green happening is more controllable. My walk-in wardrobe (sorting of spare bedroom) continues apace. I decided on Saturday to go to Ikea and check out storage options. I had been going to buy a second wardrobe, but decided last minute for the time being AT LEAST to make do with a clothes rail. I've actually decided I prefer it - with the acres of space in my flat (note sarcasm), it works better. And it adds to the illusion of wardrobe walk-inibility. Decided to hang up all my dresses on the not-insubstantially-sized rack. And filled it. I also filled the spaces I'd created for tops. And I still have clothes to put away. I was utterly disgusted by the amount of clothes I own. I already packed up and gave away three huge amah bags of stuff. And I still have so much more.

I've tried going through it again, and it's not the case that I have a lot of stuff I don't wear and am just hanging onto - despite my hoarding tendencies. Apart from a couple of more formal dresses, I wear everything on a regular basis - being media, we don't have a real dress code, so work gear tends to be jeans and a tank or a summer skirt and t-shirt. But here's the question: do I ditch (well, donate) half of my clothes, even if I regularly wear them? And just make do with having fewer items, and work on ways to mix it up? Or do I just accept that I've bought the clothes, and not shop anymore. I mean, avoid the shops - and the amazing Hong Kong sales - for a year?

This will be tough. I've already told myself I'm not going shopping for all of August (clothes/belongings shopping, that is!). I'm hopefully going to NYC in September, so I will look at The Gap and browse the stores, but I'm determined not to get carried away. I can't afford to, not in terms of cash, but in terms of my impact on the world and my wardrobe rails. It's going to be tough. But honestly, I think if I keep going into that room and reminding myself of how much I own, I won't be racing to the shops. I disgust myself!

And as for my shoes...

Well, here's to a month of avoiding Hong Kong's national sport. Wish me luck. I might have to do something like, shock, horror, read a book instead.